Friday, October 28, 2005

Shit for Sale

I will buy anything on sale. I grew up believing that paying full price is akin to dumping food as starving children from China stand tragically next to you, their drool pooling onto the floor. We were the kind of family that never ordered soda at restaurants because "For that much, we could buy a whole six pack at Wal-Mart!" Since leaving home, my greatest moments of self-assertion have been ordering diet cokes with my burgers.

Raised with this mentality, I spend countless hours delving through bins of clothing that others have wisely rejected. All for the triumphant moment in which I can say "I paid 50% off retail!" Recently it occurred to me, however, that I have become addicted to the bargain. In the pursuit of savings, I recently purchased some truly hideous sweaters. Sweaters that look as if I knit them myself, blindfolded. Sweaters that my husband looks at, and says "that's that the top?" I then shout from the tire-sized neck with a random shard of ribbon emerging from it, "Yup! And it was 50% off retail!" After returning an armful of said sweaters, I have learned some important lessons about market economies. If no one but the legally blind would pay the retail price for something, it doesn't mean I should pay 50% off retail for it.

I think this is an important life lesson. Now if only I could figure out how to return the single ply toilet paper that my husband refuses to use, even though it was 2 bucks cheaper than the Charmin...

Ms. J


Blogger Berry said...

Sweaters that look as if I knit them myself, blindfolded.

LOL, too funny!

1:14 PM  
Blogger J & J said...

If there's one thing that I personally believe is worth every penny you spend, it's toilet paper. Triple-ply or bust baby.

Mr. J

12:10 PM  

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