Monday, January 16, 2006

War of the Worlds

Earlier this week, I awoke to my husband saying “Honey, look what happened in the bathroom.” Seeing as we have neither a child we are trying to potty-train, nor a bathroom plant which sprouts money, this morning greeting was going nowhere good.

What had happened in our bathroom can only be described as utterly nasty. Sometime during our slumber, the plumbing had backed up, resulting in a stream of raw sewage seeping across the bathroom floor. Seeing as my husband had to go to work immediately, I was left to deal with the toxic wasteland.

Ever attentive, my super quickly came to assess the situation. As the two of us stood watching the tide ebb further onto the tile, he wisely commented “this is really gross.” Other tenants soon began to call with similar tales, and like a mythic hero, my super fled downstairs to tackle the building’s central sewage pipe. In the interim, I single-handedly prevented the black death from flooding into our bedroom.

Armed with paper towels, our now defiled bath mat, and some flip flops--I stood amidst the rising cess pool, thanking God for the head cold that somewhat dulled my senses of smell. After twenty minutes or so, I was relieved by Alex, who had been sent by my super to help restore peace. Alex came with work boots, an industrial sized mop, and bleach. Taking in my sad paper towels and flip flops, Alex assumed charge with a “ewww.”

A half hour later, after much hard work by Alex and myself, the deed was done. The bathroom had been restored to its former glory. Once we had word that the central blockage had been resolved, we could even flush. Alex and I shared a moment of victory, tried our best not to touch anything else in the apartment, and parted ways.

When my husband came home, he complimented our handiwork. I resisted the urge to tell him to screw himself. Instead, I did the mature thing. I directed him to the flip flops.

Ms. J


Blogger Berry said...

Ewwwwwww, OMG. When you said you were standing in that mess in flip flops I was very concerned for your health. Boots would have been the way to go. Glad you all could resolve that situation quickly. People don't realize the value of a great Super.

11:39 AM  

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